Confess here

Poiseuille · 03-18-2018, 04:36 PM

I bought wheels on eBay.

upstatedoc · 03-19-2018, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dinonz

As a student travelling on ferries (long distance - 3 hours in some rough water) I was on a rough trip. Lots of people sitting outside looking and feeling sick. So I went to the cafeteria, bought a mince pie, slipped a plastic fork in my jacket pocket, and then grabbed a sick bag. Before returning outside I put the pie in the bag. Went outside, saw a group of sick looking people and went and sat near them. I proceeded to rock back and forth with the bag near my face, and then started making similar sounds to what you made.. hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaaa and pretended to launch my lunch into the bag. Once finished, I looked in the bag, made a "hmmmm" sound, grabbed the fork from my pocket, and started eating the pie with it. Several people went straight for the rails and lost their lunch

he was quoting chunk from goonies

dinonz · 03-19-2018, 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

he was quoting chunk from goonies

I must have missed that!

ooshnoo · 03-19-2018, 01:34 PM

I never laid a finger on her. I wasn't even there.

UncleWede · 03-19-2018, 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ooshnoo

I never laid a finger on her. I wasn't even there.

The complaint wasn't about your finger . . .

Maynard · 03-20-2018, 07:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

he was quoting chunk from goonies

This gag is probably done best in the old movie "The Great Santini" - not exactly a chart-buster, but a pretty good movie (unless you like action or happy themes).

m3jala · 03-20-2018, 09:44 AM

jaye944 · 03-20-2018, 10:00 AM

That was a classic ROFLMAO post

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuiltnBoostedZ

I once fapped so hard, a unicorn died.

jaye944 · 03-20-2018, 10:01 AM

Fapping to Queen Milf, Lois Griffin

and that voice...............OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH H

slyzikk · 03-20-2018, 10:44 AM

My previous car was a Ford Fiesta.

upstatedoc · 03-20-2018, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slyzikk

My previous car was a Ford Fiesta.

ban and also ban your new username when you re-register

King Rudi · 03-20-2018, 12:39 PM

^agreed!

UncleWede · 03-20-2018, 12:54 PM

+2

Joekerr · 03-20-2018, 01:03 PM

+3

Haywood · 03-20-2018, 04:12 PM

My first car was a Ford Pinto.

UncleWede · 03-20-2018, 05:02 PM

^but you survived the tank explosion, so will let it slide

upstatedoc · 03-22-2018, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 37psi

Forgive me father for I have sinned.

i can't believe you've done this

UncleWede · 03-22-2018, 12:41 PM

I can't believe you can't beleive

Rob340i · 03-22-2018, 01:03 PM

Just found out my wife of 12 yrs is pregnant with our first she is only 1 month in so she wont let me tell anyone yet. So i had to get it off my chest.

upstatedoc · 03-22-2018, 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob340i

Just found out my wife of 12 yrs is pregnant with our first she is only 1 month in so she wont let me tell anyone yet. So i had to get it off my chest.

are you sure it's yours?

Rob340i · 03-22-2018, 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

are you sure it's yours?

I guess at first, it sounds unlikely but due to a prior health concern that we were unaware of for a long time she was unable to get pregnant. Then medication that she was on would have caused birth defects, so then we finally got her on a safe med then 3-4 months ago we started trying.... here we are today

Lups · 03-22-2018, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob340i

Just found out my wife of 12 yrs is pregnant with our first she is only 1 month in so she wont let me tell anyone yet. So i had to get it off my chest.

Okay dude, play it cool. Here is the things you can expect and you're bound to fuck up.

1. When she has morning sickness (never call it that, it comes and goes with most women!) you need to know it's your fault and you need to have crackers or other wheat based treats ready everywhere. Those aren't the healthiest things in the world but you don't want your baby to be born in jail right?

2. All the fucking crying that comes along: Either take that like a man, or be killed in a divorce. You can control the LED lights on euro settings in bad conditions on automatic settings better than you can the waterworks.

3. She can lose weight, or gain it massively, but no matter what, she feels like shit through the first and second trimester. Your basic job is to pretend you still want to have sex with her even when she doesn't want to.

4. On the last trimester read the three first ones, and think of those rules as 3x more important. She will drive you nuts, and then someone you know who is already is divorced tells you it will be easier when the baby comes out: He is divorced for a reason.

Best of luck. And when she acts up in the weirdest ways, pm me and I'll translate it to you. I'm pro at telling men what they're missing when the women freak you out.

03-18-2018, 04:36 PM	#925
Poiseuille Brigadier General 5419 Rep 3,744 Posts Drives: 2016 M4 DCT Tanzanite/Amaro Join Date: Oct 2016 Location: Princeton iTrader: (0) Garage List [0.00] [10.00]	I bought wheels on eBay. Attached Images
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03-19-2018, 01:34 PM	#928
ooshnoo Lieutenant Colonel 897 Rep 1,709 Posts Drives: 2014 428i and 2018 X5 Join Date: Mar 2017 Location: Buford, GA iTrader: (0) Garage List 2018 BMW X5 [0.00] 2014 BMW 428i [10.00]	I never laid a finger on her. I wasn't even there. __________________ ___________________ 2014 F32 428i M-Sport 2018 F15 M-Sport Last edited by ooshnoo; 03-19-2018 at 01:40 PM..
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03-20-2018, 09:44 AM	#931
m3jala Captain 545 Rep 765 Posts Drives: Jet Black 2013 BMW M3 Join Date: Jan 2018 Location: Tysons Corner, VA iTrader: (0)
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03-20-2018, 10:01 AM	#933
jaye944 Captain 1017 Rep 638 Posts Drives: a Join Date: Jul 2015 Location: a iTrader: (0)	Fapping to Queen Milf, Lois Griffin and that voice...............OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH H
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03-20-2018, 10:44 AM	#934
slyzikk New Member 2 Rep 8 Posts Drives: BMW 320d 135kW 2013 Join Date: Mar 2018 Location: Portugal iTrader: (0)	My previous car was a Ford Fiesta.
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03-20-2018, 12:39 PM	#936
King Rudi Lieutenant Colonel 13066 Rep 1,965 Posts Drives: Meat Suit Join Date: Sep 2017 Location: Planet Earth iTrader: (0)	^agreed!
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03-20-2018, 12:54 PM	#937
UncleWede Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner 18324 Rep 9,410 Posts Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oxnard, CA iTrader: (0)	+2
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03-20-2018, 01:03 PM	#938
Joekerr Banned 7914 Rep 1,923 Posts Drives: 2017 Audi S6 Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Toronto, ON iTrader: (0)	+3
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03-20-2018, 04:12 PM	#939
Haywood I know a thing or 2 about a thing or 2... 3104 Rep 3,471 Posts Drives: E36 M3 Coupe, e39 M5, i3s Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: LI, NY iTrader: (11) Garage List 2003 BMW e39 M5 [0.00] 1997 BMW e36 M3 [0.00]	My first car was a Ford Pinto. __________________ 2019 Imperial Blue Metallic i3s BEV 2003 Le Mans Blue e39 M5 Dinan S1 1997 Alpine White e36 M3 (the old gal) 2013 Mineral White e92 M3 (sold ) 2014 Carbon Black 650i M-sport (sold)
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03-20-2018, 05:02 PM	#940
UncleWede Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner 18324 Rep 9,410 Posts Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oxnard, CA iTrader: (0)	^but you survived the tank explosion, so will let it slide
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03-22-2018, 12:41 PM	#942
UncleWede Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner 18324 Rep 9,410 Posts Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oxnard, CA iTrader: (0)	I can't believe you can't beleive
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03-22-2018, 01:03 PM	#943
Rob340i Sergeant First Class 86 Rep 150 Posts Drives: 340i M Sport Join Date: Nov 2017 Location: Italy iTrader: (0)	Just found out my wife of 12 yrs is pregnant with our first she is only 1 month in so she wont let me tell anyone yet. So i had to get it off my chest.
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