Dating - Good/Bad Experiences

[Sara]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

I think we were terrible for each other, and probably since June when I blurted out let's end it (at least since then) the relationship has been pretty dead. It just got to a point where we were both telling each other the other person makes us miserable and at that point, what's the reason yknow? Then she tried putting moving here to Chicago on me and solely on me... she got a great offer at a tech company that we all use. Must suck having to work at a big tech firm making $170k total compensation fresh out of college Lots of gaslighting from a now-ex-future Mrs. Pickle was happening.

Your happiness is most important. A lot of couples I know are still together and miserable. I don't understand why someone wouldn't want to be happy. For you to recognize this, especially early on, is huge. It hurts right now, but in a year from now (or much sooner) you're going to be so happy that you nipped it in the bud instead of staying together for the sake of having a relationship. If I could give you a hug, I would.

[King Rudi]

Turkish Pickle sorry to hear my friend. I don't have anything to add, that everyone else has already stated. Grieve (if needed), process it and move on. Each time I buy a house or a car, or finish a project at work or at home; I notice things I would have looked for earlier, things I want to do better next time, easier ways of getting the same result. It's all trial and error my friend. We're all just stumbling around in the dark trying to find our way. Chin up brother and move forward.

[SickGTR]

Originally Posted by Sara

Your happiness is most important. A lot of couples I know are still together and miserable. I don't understand why someone wouldn't want to be happy. For you to recognize this, especially early on, is huge. It hurts right now, but in a year from now (or much sooner) you're going to be so happy that you nipped it in the bud instead of staying together for the sake of having a relationship. If I could give you a hug, I would.

See dude, you already have hot woman offering hugs.😳😉 Enjoy the single life!! Go get some strange:-) Get Tinder or whatever sight works for you and go to work. It was like fishing with dynamite when I was on there. You will forget about this lonely shit in no time!!

[Dang3r]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

Gentlemen,

As of Tuesday Nov 9 I am a single man. Broke up with her after almost 15 months.

I know I've been away and I come in with this but I hope no hard feelings for not updating you guys in the mean time.

Haven't even dealt with the break up myself, saying it was easier than the next few days knowing I'm outtie. Nor have I dealt with any fallout; I have so much of her stuff etc I'm in a messy situation at the moment. I'm just venting at this point...

But: yes. I am a single man, once again.

Sad to read that, man, hang on, it only goes up after deep down.

[Cyn-BMW]

Turkish Pickle: It’s only up from here. Every time I’ve broken up with a girlfriend or they have broken up with me, my life has gotten better. Keep your head up, keep pushing forward and it’ll be ok. It just takes time.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Mein11

That's the biggest take away man. Had that same learning experience after 6 years, but now makes me extremely picky because knowing what you will and won't accept create some hard lines. It's a good thing though, it sucks at first but you'll find yourself happier. Sure it's nice having someone around, but it's a lot nicer not walking on egg shells 24/7 in lieu of the sparing "good" moments.

Plus now you'll have more money and free time for better things.

wait, that's an option?

I'll be fine I think. Being by myself again sucks, but only on a physical level. We broke up because of many reasons but all ultimately pointed out to one thing: I was unhappy. I'm aware of mistakes I've made too, but it's impressive how much a negative person can take out of your day.

I have some work to do on myself too I'm not really in the "lets go bang everything that moves" mood (yet?), I'm just enjoying the perks of being by myself and hanging with friends again.

Life could be worse now and I think that's all that matters.

[ryan stewart]

Nothing like a human black hole to make you realize there are worse things than dying alone.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Nothing like a human black hole to make you realize there are worse things than dying alone.

Just when I thought I was the forums Debbie downer.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Just when I thought I was the forums Debbie downer.

I'm not being a Debbie downer. Thats a lesson right there, one I've learned. Realizing how shitty an ex was makes going it alone much easier. I'm not alone mind you, I'm just not afraid of it if this relationship ends up being shit too.

[Cyn-BMW]

A few days in Carmel, Pebble Beach, Monterey and Laguna Seca. I didn’t meet one woman. Did you guys warn them that I was going up there? I did meet a couple very cool car dudes. So, I hung out with them.

[Mein11]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

wait, that's an option?

I'll be fine I think. Being by myself again sucks, but only on a physical level. We broke up because of many reasons but all ultimately pointed out to one thing: I was unhappy. I'm aware of mistakes I've made too, but it's impressive how much a negative person can take out of your day.

I have some work to do on myself too I'm not really in the "lets go bang everything that moves" mood (yet?), I'm just enjoying the perks of being by myself and hanging with friends again.

Life could be worse now is great and I think that's all that matters.

Bang anything that moves is a pretty empty experience, better off finding someone you truly vibe with IMO. Keep improving yourself and hang out with your friends, you'll meet people through people and you'll probably do things that the relationship held you back from.

Life could always be worse, but it's okay to feel down at times. End of the day life's good man, don't let a woman (or any person for that matter) have the power to take that from you. Only get one chance on earth, enjoy the fuck out of it.

[Chihuahua]

Originally Posted by Mein11

Bang anything that moves is a pretty empty experience, better off finding someone you truly vibe with IMO.

I'll second this; I went on a bit of a tear between the ages of 28 and 30 and it was the most depressing period of my life. Mr Pickle, I'd recommend laying low for a while, gather yourself, then put yourself back out there when your head is straight again. It's much more fulfilling.

[Sara]

If you want a stable relationship get a horse





Be careful banging anything and everything! No pregnancies or STDs!! My grown ass male bestfriend thought because this girl had a hysterectomy, she can't give him HIV. I shit you not. People are fucking dumb and reckless when it comes to sex.

I'll stop being a mom now.

Edit: because I can't spell

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by Sara

If you want a stable relationship get a horse

Good one.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Chihuahua

Mr Pickle, I'd recommend laying low for a while, gather yourself, then put yourself back out there when your head is straight again. It's much more fulfilling.

Too late, he's already on tinder

[heitzke]

Originally Posted by Mein11

Bang anything that moves is a pretty empty experience, better off finding someone you truly vibe with IMO. Keep improving yourself and hang out with your friends, you'll meet people through people and you'll probably do things that the relationship held you back from.

Second or third'ing this one. It's fun for a while but ends up not exactly being a bright spot in your past. I thankfully just ended up with lots of wild stories, but time alone, a quality therapist and figuring out what I needed from relationships led me to the surprisingly timed one i'm in now. In a much better spot than I was in.

In general, sorry to hear what you're going through. It's not easy. Also fwiw, closure can be defined and found in a lot of different ways. All up to you.

[________]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Too late, he's already on tinder

Yeah I saw him there last night too. I swiped left though. Not my style.

[nyalpine90]

Turkish Pickle
keep your chin up, break ups are never easy.
stay focus, keep yourself busy and now is the time to invest in yourself.

[Sara]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Too late, he's already on tinder

Nooooo. At least use Hinge. Smaller chance of STD. Tinder is all over Pornhub

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Sara

Tinder is all over Pornhub

and you know this how?

[________]

Originally Posted by Sara

It's in the titles of some of the videos on the main page. Just gross. Never seen one with Hinge in the title.

My man is about to leave for 2.5 weeks so....

So you're back on Hinge?
Shame on you. Shame, shame shame! Lol

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Sara

It's in the titles of some of the videos on the main page. Just gross. Never seen one with Hinge in the title.

My man is about to leave for 2.5 weeks so....

Most all titles have something to do with step-siblings as well, but I somehow doubt the same girls are everyone's step-sisters.....so I've been told. :